Mothers and Daughters

According to the Quran a woman is only your mother if she gave birth to you.

S 58:1-2 Allah has heard the speech of the one who argues with you concerning her husband and complains to Allah. And Allah hears your talk. Allah is a hearer, a seer. Those who pronounce zihar among you from their women, they are not their mothers. None are their mothers but those who bore them. And they say baseness of speech and untruth. And Allah is a pardoner, a forgiver.

In S 33:4-5 we read: Allah has not made for a man two hearts in his abdomen nor has he made your husbands whom you pronounce zihar upon your mothers. Nor has he made your adopted sons your sons. That is your speech with your mouths but Allah tells the truth. And he guides to the way. Call them by their fathers; it is more equitable with Allah. But if you have not known their fathers--then your brothers in the religion and your mawali. But there is no transgression in what you have sinned. But what your hearts intended. And Allah was a forgiver, merciful.

In S 4:23 we read: Forbidden to you have been your mothers and your daughters and your sisters and your paternal aunts and your maternal aunts and the daughters of a brother and the daughters of a sister and your mothers who have suckled you and your sisters from suckling and the mothers of your women and your step-daughters who are in your guardianship of your women whom you have had relations with. But if you have not had relations with them then there is no offence upon you. And the wives of your sons who are from your backbones and that you gather between two sisters except what has preceded. Allah was a forgiver, merciful.

In Islam adoption is forbidden on the grounds that a non-biological child is not your child. So how could a girl not born of your own mother be considered your sister? In a non-Quranic hadith we read of a man told to divorce his wife on the grounds that both he and she had had the same wet nurse.

Narrated `Uqba bin Al-Harith:

I married a woman and then a black lady came to us and said, "I have suckled you both (you and your wife)." So I came to the Prophet (ﷺ) and said, "I married so-and-so and then a black lady came to us and said to me, 'I have suckled both of you.' But I think she is a liar." The Prophet (ﷺ) turned his face away from me and I moved to face his face, and said, "She is a liar." The Prophet (ﷺ) said, "How (can you keep her as your wife) when that lady has said that she has suckled both of you? So abandon (i.e., divorce) her (your wife).

https://sunnah.com/bukhari:5104

If the founder of Islam's wives were 'Mothers of the Believers', then how could he have hit at least one of them?

"She said: "He gave me a shove in the chest that hurt me and said: 'You thought that Allah and His Messenger would be unfair to you.'"

https://sunnah.com/nasai/36/25

In another we read of 'Mothers' being slapped:

"Abu Bakr (Allah be pleased with him) came and sought permission to see Allah's Messenger (ﷺ). He found people sitting at his door and none amongst them had been granted permission, but it was granted to Abu Bakr and he went in. Then came 'Umar and he sought permission and it was granted to him, and he found Allah's Apostle (ﷺ) sitting sad and silent with his wives around him. He (Hadrat 'Umar) said: I would say something which would make the Prophet (ﷺ) laugh, so he said: Messenger of Allah, I wish you had seen (the treatment meted out to) the daughter ofKhadija when you asked me some money, and I got up and slapped her on her neck. Allah's Messenger (mav peace be upon him) laughed and said: They are around me as you see, asking for extra money. Abu Bakr (Allah be pleased with him) then got up went to 'A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) and slapped her on the neck, and 'Umar stood up before Hafsa and slapped her saying: You ask Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) which he does not possess."

https://sunnah.com/muslim/18/39

Further reading: Qur'an Inconsistency: Can I call her mother?

Some scholars have asserted that it is permissible to have sexual relations with a daughter born out of wedlock. From an Answering Islam article:

There are certain teachings found within Islamic tradition and/or taught by Muslim scholars which are of a perverted nature. One such example would be those traditions which mention Muhammad permitting a young man to suckle on his adoptive mother's breast in order to make it forbidden for them to marry (www.answering-islam.org/Shamoun/nursing_of_adults.htm).

There is more. There are a number of passages in the Quran which have led some Muslim scholars to condone practices that are morally very highly qestionable. The focus of this paper is to highlight two particular perversions which Muslim scholars permitted on the basis of specific Quranic passages.

Here is the first passage which led Muslim scholars to tolerate some strange and evil practices.

Prohibited to you (for marriage) are: your mothers, daughters, sisters; father's sisters, mother's sisters; brother's daughters, sister's daughters; foster-mothers (who gave you suck), foster-sisters; your wives' mothers; your step-daughters under your guardianship, born of your wives to whom ye have gone, no prohibition if ye have not gone in; (those who have been) wives of your sons proceeding from your loins; and two sisters in wedlock at one and the same time, except for what is past; for Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. Surah 4:23

Al-Qurtubi, considered to be one of Sunni Islam's premiere commentators, wrote in connection with this verse:

وَاخْتَلَفُوا فِي الْوَطْء بِالزِّنَى هَلْ يُحَرِّم أَمْ لَا ; فَقَالَ أَكْثَر أَهْل الْعِلْم : لَوْ أَصَابَ رَجُل اِمْرَأَة بِزِنًى لَمْ يَحْرُم عَلَيْهِ نِكَاحُهَا بِذَلِكَ ; وَكَذَلِكَ لَا تَحْرُم عَلَيْهِ اِمْرَأَته إِذَا زَنَى بِأُمِّهَا أَوْ بِابْنَتِهَا , وَحَسْبُهُ أَنْ يُقَام عَلَيْهِ الْحَدّ , ثُمَّ يَدْخُل بِامْرَأَتِهِ . وَمَنْ زَنَى بِامْرَأَةٍ ثُمَّ أَرَادَ نِكَاح أُمّهَا أَوْ اِبْنَتهَا لَمْ تَحْرُمَا عَلَيْهِ بِذَلِكَ . وَقَالَتْ طَائِفَة : تَحْرُم عَلَيْهِ . رُوِيَ هَذَا الْقَوْل عَنْ عِمْرَان بْن حُصَيْن ; وَبِهِ قَالَ الشَّعْبِيّ وَعَطَاء وَالْحَسَن وَسُفْيَان الثَّوْرِيّ وَأَحْمَد وَإِسْحَاق وَأَصْحَاب الرَّأْي , وَرُوِيَ عَنْ مَالِك ; وَأَنَّ الزِّنَى يُحَرِّم الْأُمّ وَالِابْنَة وَأَنَّهُ بِمَنْزِلَةِ الْحَلَال , وَهُوَ قَوْل أَهْل الْعِرَاق . وَالصَّحِيح مِنْ قَوْل مَالِك وَأَهْل الْحِجَاز : أَنَّ الزِّنَى لَا حُكْم لَهُ ; لِأَنَّ اللَّه سُبْحَانَهُ وَتَعَالَى قَالَ : " وَأُمَّهَات نِسَائِكُمْ " وَلَيْسَتْ الَّتِي زَنَى بِهَا مِنْ أُمَّهَات نِسَائِهِ , وَلَا اِبْنَتهَا مِنْ رَبَائِبِهِ . وَهُوَ قَوْل الشَّافِعِيّ وَأَبِي ثَوْر . لِأَنَّهُ لَمَّا اِرْتَفَعَ الصَّدَاق فِي الزِّنَى وَوُجُوب الْعِدَّة وَالْمِيرَاث وَلُحُوق الْوَلَد وَوُجُوب الْحَدّ اِرْتَفَعَ أَنْ يُحْكَم لَهُ بِحُكْمِ النِّكَاح الْجَائِز . وَرَوَى الدَّارَقُطْنِيّ مِنْ حَدِيث الزُّهْرِيّ عَنْ عُرْوَة عَنْ عَائِشَة قَالَتْ : سُئِلَ رَسُول اللَّه صَلَّى اللَّه عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَنْ رَجُل زَنَى بِامْرَأَةٍ فَأَرَادَ أَنْ يَتَزَوَّجهَا أَوْ اِبْنَتهَا فَقَالَ : ( لَا يُحَرِّم الْحَرَامُ الْحَلَالَ إِنَّمَا يُحَرِّم مَا كَانَ بِنِكَاحٍ ) . وَمِنْ الْحُجَّة لِلْقَوْلِ الْآخَر إِخْبَار النَّبِيّ صَلَّى اللَّه عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَنْ جُرَيْج وَقَوْله : ( يَا غُلَام مَنْ أَبُوك ) قَالَ : فُلَان الرَّاعِي . فَهَذَا يَدُلّ عَلَى أَنَّ الزِّنَى يُحَرِّم كَمَا يُحَرِّم الْوَطْء الْحَلَال ; فَلَا تَحِلّ أُمّ الْمَزْنِيّ بِهَا وَلَا بَنَاتهَا لِآبَاءِ الزَّانِي وَلَا لِأَوْلَادِهِ ; وَهِيَ رِوَايَة اِبْن الْقَاسِم فِي الْمُدَوَّنَة . وَيُسْتَدَلّ بِهِ أَيْضًا عَلَى أَنَّ الْمَخْلُوقَة مِنْ مَاء الزِّنَى لَا تَحِلّ لِلزَّانِي بِأُمِّهَا , وَهُوَ الْمَشْهُور . قَالَ عَلَيْهِ السَّلَام : ( لَا يَنْظُر اللَّه إِلَى رَجُل نَظَرَ إِلَى فَرْج اِمْرَأَة وَابْنَتِهَا ) وَلَمْ يَفْصِل بَيْنَ الْحَلَال وَالْحَرَام . وَقَالَ عَلَيْهِ السَّلَام : ( لَا يَنْظُر اللَّه إِلَى مَنْ كَشَفَ قِنَاعَ اِمْرَأَة وَابْنَتهَا ) . قَالَ اِبْن خُوَيْزِ مَنْدَادٍ : وَلِهَذَا قُلْنَا إِنَّ الْقُبْلَة وَسَائِر وُجُوه الِاسْتِمْتَاع يَنْشُر الْحُرْمَة . وَقَالَ عَبْد الْمَلِك الْمَاجِشُون : إِنَّهَا تَحِلّ ; وَهُوَ الصَّحِيح لِقَوْلِهِ تَعَالَى : " وَهُوَ الَّذِي خَلَقَ مِنْ الْمَاء بَشَرًا فَجَعَلَهُ نَسَبًا وَصِهْرًا " [ الْفُرْقَان : 54 ] يَعْنِي بِالنِّكَاحِ الصَّحِيح , عَلَى مَا يَأْتِي فِي " الْفُرْقَان " بَيَانه . وَوَجْه التَّمَسُّك مِنْ الْحَدِيث عَلَى تِلْكَ الْمَسْأَلَتَيْنِ أَنَّ النَّبِيّ صَلَّى اللَّه عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَدْ حَكَى عَنْ جُرَيْج أَنَّهُ نَسَبَ اِبْن الزِّنَى لِلزَّانِي , وَصَدَّقَ اللَّه نِسْبَتَهُ بِمَا خَرَقَ لَهُ مِنْ الْعَادَة فِي نُطْقِ الصَّبِيّ بِالشَّهَادَةِ لَهُ بِذَلِكَ ; وَأَخْبَرَ بِهَا النَّبِيّ صَلَّى اللَّه عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَنْ جُرَيْج فِي مَعْرِض الْمَدْح وَإِظْهَار كَرَامَته ; فَكَانَتْ تِلْكَ النِّسْبَة صَحِيحَة بِتَصْدِيقِ اللَّه تَعَالَى وَبِإِخْبَارِ النَّبِيّ صَلَّى اللَّه عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَنْ ذَلِكَ ; فَثَبَتَتْ الْبُنُوَّة وَأَحْكَامهَا . فَإِنْ قِيلَ : فَيَلْزَم عَلَى هَذَا أَنْ تَجْرِيَ أَحْكَام الْبُنُوَّة وَالْأُبُوَّة مِنْ التَّوَارُث وَالْوِلَايَات وَغَيْر ذَلِكَ , وَقَدْ اِتَّفَقَ الْمُسْلِمُونَ عَلَى أَنَّهُ لَا تَوَارُث بَيْنَهُمَا فَلَمْ تَصِحّ تِلْكَ النِّسْبَة ؟ فَالْجَوَاب : إِنَّ ذَلِكَ مُوجِب مَا ذَكَرْنَاهُ . وَمَا اِنْعَقَدَ عَلَيْهِ الْإِجْمَاع مِنْ الْأَحْكَام اِسْتَثْنَيْنَاهُ , وَبَقِيَ الْبَاقِي عَلَى أَصْل ذَلِكَ الدَّلِيل , وَاَللَّه أَعْلَم . وَاخْتَلَفَ الْعُلَمَاء أَيْضًا مِنْ هَذَا الْبَاب فِي مَسْأَلَة اللَّائِط ; فَقَالَ مَالِك وَالشَّافِعِيّ وَأَبُو حَنِيفَة وَأَصْحَابهمْ : لَا يَحْرُم النِّكَاح بِاللِّوَاطِ . وَقَالَ الثَّوْرِيّ : إِذَا لَعِبَ بِالصَّبِيِّ حَرُمَتْ عَلَيْهِ أُمّه ; وَهُوَ قَوْل أَحْمَد بْن حَنْبَل . قَالَ : إِذَا تَلَوَّطَ بِابْنِ اِمْرَأَته أَوْ أَبِيهَا أَوْ أَخِيهَا حَرُمَتْ عَلَيْهِ اِمْرَأَته . وَقَالَ الْأَوْزَاعِيّ : إِذَا لَاطَ بِغُلَامٍ وَوُلِدَ لِلْمَفْجُورِ بِهِ بِنْتٌ لَمْ يَجُزْ لِلْفَاجِرِ أَنْ يَتَزَوَّجَهَا ; لِأَنَّهَا بِنْت مَنْ قَدْ دَخَلَ بِهِ . وَهُوَ قَوْل أَحْمَد بْن حَنْبَل .

The scholars have differed on the issue of prohibition of sexual intercourse with someone born out of adultery. The majority of knowledgeable scholars have said that if a man commits adultery with a woman, that act does not prohibit him from marrying her. Likewise, a man’s wife is not prohibited from him if he commits adultery with her mother or her daughter. It is sufficient for him to receive the punitive judgment (based on Sharia), then he may have intercourse with his wife. If a man commits adultery with a woman then desired to marry her mother or her daughter, they are not prohibited from him because of this act.

Another group said (such a marriage) is prohibited for him. This opinion was reported by Amran Ibn Husain, as well as Al-Shu’bi and Atta’, Al Hassan, Sufyan Al–Thuri, Ahmad, Ishaq and those of opinion. It was reported by Malik that adultery prohibits (a man’s relationship with both) the mother and the daughter and this act (of adultery) has the same prohibitions that a legal marriage has. This is also the saying of the people of Iraq. However, the (only) correct portion of Malik’s saying is that adultery produces no regulations. For Allah, exalted and glorified, said in Surah 4:23, "Your wives' mothers," BUT DID NOT SAY, "He who committed adultery with his wives’ mothers, nor his daughter whom he conceived through adultery." This is the saying of Al-Shafi’i and Abu Thuri…

… Abdul Malik Ibn Al-Maj-shun said such a marriage (between a man and the daughter he conceived through adultery) IS PERMISSIBLE; which is the correct understanding of Allah’s saying in Surah 25:54, "It is He Who has created man from water: then has He established relationships of lineage and marriage," referring to an approved legal marriage. This will be explained in Surah 25…

…The scholars also differed on this subject in the case of homosexual intercourse. For Malik, Al-Shafi’i, Abu Hanifa and their companions said that legal marriage is not prohibited because of (homosexual) sodomy. However, Al-Thuri said, "If a young male is molested, then the boy’s mother is forbidden in marriage to the molester." This is also the saying of Ahmad Ibn Hanbal who said, "If a man SODOMIZES the son of a woman he has married, or performs this act with her FATHER or BROTHER, then the woman is prohibited from that man." Al-Awzaghi said, "If a man sodomizes another male, and the violated man begets a daughter in due time, then this daughter is prohibited in marriage from the violator because she will be the daughter of someone HE HAS PENETRATED." (Source; translation ours)

The following verse was already mentioned above by al-Qurtubi:

"It is He Who has created man from water: Then has He established relationships of lineage and marriage: for thy Lord has power (over all things)." Surah 25:54

Al-Qurtubi comments:

نَسَبًا وَصِهْرًا النَّسَب وَالصِّهْر مَعْنَيَانِ يَعُمَّانِ كُلّ قُرْبَى تَكُون بَيْن آدَمِيَّيْنِ . قَالَ اِبْن الْعَرَبِيّ : النَّسَب عِبَارَة عَنْ خَلْط الْمَاء بَيْن الذَّكَر وَالْأُنْثَى عَلَى وَجْه الشَّرْع ; فَإِنْ كَانَ بِمَعْصِيَةٍ كَانَ خَلْقًا مُطْلَقًا وَلَمْ يَكُنْ نَسَبًا مُحَقَّقًا , وَلِذَلِكَ لَمْ يَدْخُل تَحْت قَوْله : " حُرِّمَتْ عَلَيْكُمْ أُمَّهَاتكُمْ وَبَنَاتكُمْ " [ النِّسَاء : 23 ] بِنْته مِنْ الزِّنَى ; لِأَنَّهَا لَيْسَتْ بِبِنْتٍ لَهُ فِي أَصَحّ الْقَوْلَيْنِ لِعُلَمَائِنَا وَأَصَحّ الْقَوْلَيْنِ فِي الدِّين ; وَإِذَا لَمْ يَكُنْ نَسَب شَرْعًا فَلَا صِهْر شَرْعًا فَلَا يُحَرِّم الزِّنَى بِنْت أُمّ وَلَا أُمّ بِنْت , وَمَا يَحْرُم مِنْ الْحَلَال لَا يَحْرُم مِنْ الْحَرَام ; لِأَنَّ اللَّه اِمْتَنَّ بِالنَّسَبِ وَالصِّهْر عَلَى عِبَاده وَرَفَعَ قَدْرهمَا , وَعَلَّقَ الْأَحْكَام فِي الْحِلّ وَالْحُرْمَة عَلَيْهِمَا فَلَا يَلْحَق الْبَاطِل بِهِمَا وَلَا يُسَاوِيهِمَا . قُلْت : اِخْتَلَفَ الْفُقَهَاء فِي نِكَاح الرَّجُل اِبْنَته مِنْ زِنًى أَوْ أُخْته أَوْ بِنْت اِبْنه مِنْ زِنًى ; فَحَرَّمَ ذَلِكَ قَوْم مِنْهُمْ اِبْن الْقَاسِم , وَهُوَ قَوْل أَبِي حَنِيفَة وَأَصْحَابه , وَأَجَازَ ذَلِكَ آخَرُونَ مِنْهُمْ عَبْد الْمَلِك بْن الْمَاجِشُونِ , وَهُوَ قَوْل الشَّافِعِيّ , وَقَدْ مَضَى هَذَا فِي " النِّسَاء " مُجَوَّدًا

Regarding the terms "lineage and relationship through marriage":

Lineage and relationship through marriage are two terms that describe the personal relationships that may exist between humans. Ibn Al-Arabi said, "Lineage is an expression referring to the mixture of fluids between a male and a female from a religious legal point of view. However, if this union (between male and female) occurs through disobedience (fornication) then the resulting child is not considered a part of a person’s true lineage. That is why a daughter born from adultery is not mentioned in Allah’s saying, ‘Prohibited to you (for marriage) are: your mothers and daughters’ (Surah 4:23) because she is not considered a daughter according to the most authentic teaching of our (Islamic) scholars and the most authentic teaching of our religion. If there is no legal lineage then there is no legal relationship; for adultery does not prohibit (from marriage) the daughter of the mother (you committed adultery with) nor the mother of a woman (you committed adultery with). What is lawfully prohibited is not also prohibited due to sin, for Allah has bestowed lineage and relation through marriage upon His servants and greatly esteemed these relationships. Allah has also established laws identifying what is legal and what is prohibited, which are not equal to each other; therefore falsehood cannot be a part of these laws."

I (Qurtubi) said: The scholars have differed on the permissibility of a man marrying his daughter who was the result of an adulterous relationship; or for that matter marrying his sister or granddaughter who was the result of adultery. Some prohibited this type of relationship; among them was Ibn Al Qasim, which is also the saying of Abu Hanifa and his companions. Others however, allowed this type of marriage such as Abdul Malik Al Maj’shun, which is also the saying of Al Shafi’i. This was detailed in the explanation of Surah 4 (Al Nisa’). (Source)

Summary Analysis

The quotes provided by al-Qurtubi raises some very disturbing questions. In the first place, al-Qurtubi mentions the opinions of scholars who say that sodomizers cannot marry the mother of the child, or the daughter or sister of the person whom they molested. The substantial number of early Islamic scholars who discussed this issue suggests that sodomy was a problem in the Muslim community and its various aspects had to be legislated; otherwise, why would they even bring up the prohibitions produced by sodomy if such a practice wasn't being observed by at least some Muslims? Even more disturbing is that these scholars say nothing about punishing the sodomizer for committing such a heinous and abominable sexual act! This lends credence to what we wrote about the Quran failing to explicitly prohibit homosexuality, specifically sodomy with young boys (www.answering-islam.org/Responses/Menj/homosexual.htm).

Secondly, how does having a daughter from an adulterous relationship make her sexually permissible for the father when she is his very own flesh and blood? Regardless of how she was conceived, she still remains the man's biological offspring and is therefore sexually off limits to the father. It is obvious that these Muslim scholars are permitting incest, a gross perversion of sexual mores.

{Sidenote: The prohibitions (or the lack thereof) resulting from adulterous affairs presupposes that persons committing adultery would not be put to death. Otherwise, there would have been no need to enumerate forbidden sexual relations which resulted from committing adultery since those committing this sin would have been put to death. This supports the position that adulterers are not to be stoned, contrary to Islamic Law (Sharia) which, on the basis of hadiths, prescribes stoning for married people who commit adultery (cf. surah 24:2-3).}

Third, pay careful attention to the reason why these scholars could even condone such wild, perverted views. It all stems from the Quran being incomplete and insufficient, especially in providing specific details on a given subject, i.e. permissible versus impermissible sexual acts. Note again what al-Qurtubi says about Surah 4:23:

... For Allah, exalted and glorified, said in Surah 4:23, "Your wives' mothers," BUT DID NOT SAY, "He who committed adultery with his wives’ mothers, nor his daughter whom he conceived through adultery." ...

Al-Qurtubi bases his position on what Allah didn't say, i.e. Allah didn't specifically prohibit having sexual relations with the kin of the woman with whom adultery was committed! Islamic Scholarship on the Issue of Incest and Sodomy